The Toon Patrol are a team of five weasels who serve Judge Doom and the Villain League in Who Framed Roger Rabbit.
In the film, the Toon Patrol are the law enforcers of Toontown, although they behave more like vigilantes and mercenaries. Judge Doom has hired them to arrest Roger for the murder of Marvin Acme. Their vehicle is a 'real' black 1937 Dodge Humpback panel truck which serves as a paddy wagon. The vehicle is fitted with official City of Los Angeles "Toon Patrol" decals on the front doors.
Like all the other Toons in the movie, the Toon Patrol are invincible to physical body harm except from a chemical blend called "The Dip." A combination of powerful solvents, The Dip dissolves the ink and paint which comprise the toons.
In the case of the weasels, it is shown that prolonged laughter is lethal to them; while Eddie Valiant jokes around in front of them during the climax of the film, all except their leader Smart Ass the Weasel die from laughing at him; Smart Ass meets his demise after Valiant kicks him into a vat of The Dip.
- Smart Ass the Weasel: Smart Ass the Weasel (A.K.A. "Wise Guy") , voiced by David Lander, is the leader of the Weasels. He is ranked a sergeant by Judge Doom. Smart Ass has brown fur and wears a light pink double-breasted zoot suit coat with a gold chain in the left pocket, a white dress shirt with a reddish pink, bedjewelled tie, a matching hat and spats on his feet. Smart Ass' weapon of choice is a revolver, though in the bar scene, he is shown threatening Eddie with a switchblade. Though very sarcastic, Smart Ass is the straight-man of the group, possessing the most self control and the least "Toonish" attitude. While he is very antagonistic in the film, he seems to care about the other members of the Toon Patrol; he is the first to warn them about what might happen to them if they can't control their laughter. However, like them, he still enjoys a good laugh, himself. Smart Ass commits a malapropism almost every time he speaks, such as when he says that a tip on Roger's whereabouts has been "corrugated" ("corroborated") by several sources. Smart Ass is the third weasel to die at the end of the film, though not by losing control of his laughter. Upon disagreeing with a lyric in the song Eddie "entertains" the weasels with, Eddie kicks Smart Ass in the crotch, sending him flying into the mixer on the Dip machine, where he dissolves and dies.
- Greasy the Weasel: Greasy the Weasel, voiced by Charles Fleischer, is allegedly the runner-up for leader of the Weasels. He is Puerto Rican, and has long greasy black hair and dark brown fur. Greasy wears a green zoot suit styled trench coat and trousers hiked up to his chest, partially obscuring a pink tie and white dress shirt, and spectator shoes; he appropriately resembles a zoot suit gangster from the L.A. "Zoot Suit Riots" of the 1940s. Like his compatriot Stupid, Greasy is overweight, although this does not appear to have affected his self-esteem. Of all the Weasels in the film, Greasy is most eager to fight, and wields a switchblade as his weapon of choice, though he is also seen carrying a semi-automatic pistol while investigating Eddie's office. Greasy is mostly shown speaking English with a strong Puerto Rican accent, but he curses in Spanish when a bear trap hidden in Jessica's cleavage clamps down on his hand as he frisks in between her breasts, and when Roger shoots into the Acme Factory via a storm drain, carrying Greasy (who was standing on top of it) with him towards the ceiling. He appears perverted, as he quickly takes Judge Doom's orders to search Jessica for Acme's will as an opportunity to feel her. Greasy is the fourth weasel to die after losing control of his laughter, and drops dead out of the cab of the Dip Machine.
- Psycho the Weasel: Psycho the Weasel, voiced by Charles Fleischer, is the most insane weasel in the gang. He wears an unbuckled straitjacket, has blue eyes with yellow and white swirls and his weapon of choice is a straight razor. He only has two lines in the film; he first speaks as he prepares to shoot dip at Roger and Jessica, when he says "Time to kill the rabbit" and when he waves "Bye-bye" after he dies. Psycho is the last weasel to die, not by losing control of his laughter, but by losing his footing and dropping on the giant rotating brush of the Dip Machine. He apparently gets excited by the concept of killing, as he is heard gleefully laughing when Judge Doom kills the toon shoe in the bucket of dip; he is nearly drooling in anticipation as Smart Ass attempts to drive into Benny the cab, and he takes it upon himself to shoot the dip at Roger and Jessica. On a few occasions, it is implied that he enjoys pretending his straitjacket is buckled by hugging himself tightly, namely when he exits the Toon Patrol's car in his first appearance, and while laughing after Eddie stuffs a bar of soap into Smart Ass's mouth. He remained a threat after his death; as his soul rose out of the warehouse, he turned the pressurized dip spray back at Roger and Jessica.
- Wheezy the Weasel: Wheezy the Weasel, voiced by June Foray, is the smoking weasel, and has a mouth full of several smoking cigarettes. Wheezy wears a whitish mashed bowler hat in which he carries an additional stash of cigarrettes, a black vest, a loose tie and a wrinkled shirt. His weapon of choice is a Tommy Gun but he only uses it once in the film (when he shoots Eddie Valiant's door open), preferring to use physical combat. He is the second weasel to die after losing control of his laughter and also presumably from too much smoking. He appears afraid of dying, as he is seen unsuccessfully trying to pull his soul back into his body, though when it breaks free, it does not appear regretful. He has blue fur while his comrades have brown fur. If he dosen't have cigarrettes in his mouth while speaking he has a deep voice and when he does he has a very raspy voice. He speaks twice in the film; after Roger and Eddie free Benny the Cab, and in the Acme Factory while tying Jessica and Roger up.
- Stupid the Weasel: Stupid the Weasel, voiced by Fred Newman, is the stupidest one in the gang. He is overweight, while all the other Weasels are quite slim (minus Greasy). Stupid wears a blue and white striped T-shirt, a red beanie with a propeller and white sneakers with untied laces. His weapon of choice is a baseball bat with a nail through it. He is so stupid that he is seen hitting himself over the head with his own weapon while laughing. He has one line in the film, when he excitedly informs Judge Doom that Toon Town is on the other side of the wall in the Acme Factory, which he and Wheezy are drilling open. He is the first weasel to die after losing control of his laughter and his body is seen clutching a lily.
- It is shown in the original script that there were going to be twelve weasels rather than five; the other seven are named Slimy, Flasher, Ragtag, Drunk, Hunter, Copy, and Antoine. The only two of these weasels who were actually sketched are Slimy and Flasher, although no voicework for them was ever completed. Slimy was a black weasel who puked slime, and carried a blackjack as a weapon. Flasher, as his name implies, wore a trenchcoat, but did not carry a visual weapon. The conceptual art of these characters is included in the 15th anniversary DVD edition of Who Framed Roger Rabbit.
Role in the series
The Toon Patrol reprise their role from the film, but after their demises, they are resurrected by Mirage to forever serve the Villain League. one over-eger fan made up the fact that they'll reform and become shell lougers, but this is not truely considered by Scroopfan till he actselly wants to.